Emotional eating

Chocolate is my drug of choice. Food in general, actually. Discussing my eating habits with my acupuncturist a while back, I quipped about the sedative effect of carbs. I wasn't really kidding.

I had my first RE appt in January. I did okay for the first few months of the year, what with getting all my testing done, having my BIG uterine polyp removed, breaking up with boyfriend, asking old gay friend to be my baby daddy, switching clinics twice. I actually lost some weight before being ready to cycle in June. Then that first cycle got cancelled. All bets were off. I haven't been on a scale since. I tell myself I won't get on the scale until an OB makes me. So there!
I feel like a blob.

I bagged on a social event hosted by my BFF this evening. I'm sure there were plenty of people there that I know and like and don't get to see often. But I just wasn't feeling strong enough to brush off the stupid or insensitive comments. Like this one in an email from a friend after I emailed her about my negative beta. "I know you've tried everything and probably acupuncture too, but that's how my one friend had hers at 'our age'." Ummm, yeah. Right.

I also didn't want to go because I feel fat and blobby.

I have an appointment to have my hair highlighted on Saturday. It's very expensive, but Larry is worth it. When he's done with me, I do not look like I've had my hair highlighted. I do not look processed. My hair looks sunkissed. Upon my request, he paints on highlights so subtly that I don't need to come back for touch ups. It grows out naturally. For the last 2 years I've gone once a year, in the Spring. I think I need a little Spring now. Thank goodness for Larry.