Well, it took me until this afternoon to send the response to my friend's email.
I put together Kristin's and Areyoukiddingme's suggested wording, along with the link from Bleu.
This is what I sent:
I know you mean well but, unfortunately, thats not how this email came across to me. I appreciate your wanting to help, but if you want to know how I feel right now, please read this. http://www.trusera.com/health/journals/joysuzanne/joysuzanne-s-journal/support-your-local-infertile
xoxo,
Dora
This is what I received in return:
That's fine I will not reach out to you again.
Good luck.
Nice. Guess I'm done.
Can you imagine the response if I'd linked to Tertia's post?
Just when I thought things were going smoothly…
8 years ago
11 comments:
If a friend doesn't understand, and reacts in the way she did, I don't think it's worth any more of your mind share.
I've dropped so many relationships because of IF - I feel right now, I owe it to myself to put ME ahead of them. I've stopped sucking it up to be nice and polite.
Sorry she didn't get it. We're all here for you - you know that!
Oh, for God's sakes. That isn't what you asked for and if she wasn't so focused on herself and her own hurt feelings and shame she'd have seen that.
Sorry she responded that way. It really sucks to try to be honest and have someone decide you're the bad guy.
I agree with Nikki - if she was worth really being friends with, she'd at least have considered what you had to say. Pooey!
I think it's probably true that she is focused on herself and her own hurt at this point. She may come around eventually and realize that you weren't trying to be hurtful just honest. Or she may not. If she doesn't then I wouldn't waste any more energy on it all. Easier said then done but like the other said if she is going to let something like this get in the way of a friendship she probably isn't really worth it.
If I say 'screw her', will you forgive me for awearing in your comments section?
xx
J
Oh, how mature of her. Apparently she wants to GIVE advice but not receive any in return. Sounds like she may not have been a true 'friend' to begin with....
Sorry you have to go through this though...it sucks finding out that friends aren't what you thought they were.
Wow. How incredibly insensitive. I'm sorry she didn't get it. Maybe she will when she has had some time to ruminate on it.
I say good riddance to her. You're better off.
Some people just don't get it and that is her problem not yours. You tried and sorry it did not work out. HUGS!!
Very disappointing, but obviously not a friend you need. Now I wish you'd sent the other link. And since you encourage swearing on this blog I have to say that my first thought after reading her reply was this B*tch needs to seriously get over herself! I say good riddance!
BTW ... I LMAO regarding the pants incident yesterday. I always worry about that happending to me in front of my classroom full of teenagers! LOL
sigh...it is so sad when friendships suffer because of a lack of support/understanding about infertility. I had to let go a friend a year ago because she wouldn't stop telling me how I needed to get over being a Mother. She was one of those, "Maybe God is trying to tell you something" gals. It hurt like a mofo as we had been friends for years and years. But getting hurt time and time again just damaged me.
I am so sorry that you are losing a friend as well, but I hope she can come back to you.
xo
It does not sound like she even read it. Her response and her previous note makes me think she is simple one who thinks they know better and not open to "hearing" anything from anyone.
Hopefully she never experiences IF or she will have a huge road of guilt ahead but nonetheless she doesn't really sound like a friendship worth working for.
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